I wish that teenagers came with a handbook. Just when I think I have Kendall figured out, I don’t. I have too many examples of this to list, so I’ll just tell you the most recent episode. Yesterday my husband & I took our little Westie Mia into the vet possibly for surgery…possibly not. We knew because of x-rays earlier this week that she had a stone in her bladder. A healthy dog would need surgery, but Mia, I would not describe her as healthy. She has Addison’s Disease & we spend much time & money keeping her healthy. But after consulting with the vet we decided that her quality of life would be vastly improved with the surgery. So we went ahead with it. Kendall was at school & was not involved in the decision, which honestly, I didn’t think was a big deal.
Mia did well in her surgery & they removed a huge stone from her bladder & a cyst from her eye lid. She looked nothing short of pathetic.
Anyway, we get Mia all situated at home & try talking to Kendall about her. It should be noted that Kendall is a huge animal lover. Her beloved cat Frisco died very unexpectedly a year ago & since then, her compassion for Mia has disappeared.
Kendall: I don’t know why you wasted money on that surgery. So stupid.
Me: Because we love her & it will improve her quality of life.
Throughout the night:
Kendall: Can you make her stop moaning? Can’t you shut her up?
When I went to bed & saw Kendall in my bed watching tv I asked if she wanted to hang out. She looked at me with utter contempt & flew into her bedroom. What the heck? This kid loves animals? Where is her compassion? Why is she mad at me? What’d I do wrong this time?
This morning when Kendall got up she looked at me like I was her most hated enemy. She refused to speak to me. Finally, I went and asked her what the problem is.
Kendall: Nothing is wrong.
Me: You seem pretty upset, what is bugging you.
Kendall: I said NOTHING!
Me: Let me take a guess: you’re mad that Mia had surgery & that Frisco did not.
Kendall: (the tears start flowing)
Me: Kendall, Frisco could not have been saved. His kidneys failed & there was nothing we could do. He went quickly. We can help Mia have a happier life.
Kendall: (still not speaking to me & still crying)
So my daughter has been holding resentment that we couldn’t save her cat for 13 months. It has made her hate Mia. Be disgusted with me. And be generally unhappy. I am at a loss. A reasonable person would know that we did the best we could in both situations. But I don’t think teenagers are reasonable.